Friday, May 16, 2003
I am in biology and I am very very tired and I am also hungry and tired and falling asleep and this computer screen is hurting my eyes. Did I mention tired? Very tired.
We saw Matrix: Reloaded last night. It was a pretty good movie, but it definitely was not the first Matrix. It was pretty damn packed for a Thursday. Well, it was opening night, but still. We had to sit in the front, and there were 11 of us so we had to save tons of seats and it was a pain in the posterior end.
There were some very cool scenes (i.e. the car chase, which was very heavily hyped up, but was worth all the hype). There were also some very Matrix-y scenes that maybe weren't so well done at points... the scene where he fights tons of Agent Smiths was OK, but sometimes Keanu got all rubbery and it became painfully obvious that he was being computer generated. The scene at the French guy's house was also OK, but when they were flying around you could sometimes practically see the wires they were hanging from. I mean, you couldn't actually see the wires, but you could see how they were hanging off of them pretty obviously.
There were also some scenes which were just gawd-awful. These were the sex scenes. There was really only one sex scene, and it was intercut with a rave dance scene set in a cave full of molten lava and sweaty, inadequetly clad people. And Keanu Reeves is gross without clothes on. And Trinity, if you look at her face, was definitely not having a good time. She looked pained. And they both had all those Matrix-connection things all over them. And they were sweaty. And people were raving. Our reactions consisted mostly of laughter and expressions of disgust.
There was another scene that wasn't technically a sex scene... this was chez the French guy, where he sent a woman a 'special' cake, that made her 'very happy'. To emphasize this, you got to see the woman's, um, excitement, via the Matrix, presumably as Neo sees it. Errr.. ya. Entirely unnecessary, in my opinion. There were also too many shots of people's lips all up close and whatnot. People's lips, that close up and enlarged on the big screen, are not nice to regard. Especially not when there's spittle hanging off them.
Then of course you get all the slightly bizarre allusions. I probably missed most of them anyways. Were those guys werewolves (silver bullets)? Those twins were supposed to be ghosts, non? They had creepy lipstick on. The French guy was some sort of devil? Perhaps the Devil? After all, his irate wife was Persephone, who, in Greek (or Roman, I always confuse 'em) mythology is the unwilling wife of Pluto/Hades/whichever one. The ruler of Hell, in any event. The Devil is French. I am somewhat impressed by the way that those Wachowski fellows predicted our current mass-Francophobia. The number of seconds they have left before something or other happens is 314. Pi. Har de har har. 'Tis infinite, you know.
Niobe (Jada Pinkett Smith) was played up a great deal, and she was barely in the movie. But I read that she is the star of the video game, which you must run out and purchase if you are a die-hard Matrix fan. I don't do those video game things. Her hair looked like that orange girl on Farscape. Secoza, or something like that. That's all I could think of whenever I saw her. I am a horrible, horrible, horrible geek and, thus, a bad person. I also thought that Morpheus was stupid and annoying.
There's probably more that I could say about the Matrix... hmm... lemme think... Oh, at the beginning, I had trouble knowing whether they were in the Matrix or in the real world. The key is, look at how they're dressed. If they're wearing nasty old Gap sweaters, they're in the real world. If they're wearing lots of leather and black sunglasses, they're in the Matrix. Yes, everyone wears the leather. Trinity seemed to actually be wearing some sort of liquid leather that had been poured on to her and then hardened. There is no other explanantion for how she got into that thing. Persephone, in the hind views, also appeared shrink-wrapped.
Hey Neo, stop your beatin' of Elrond, master of elves
Kate is looking at shoes online. I don't like shoes. I am happy I am wearing sneakers now, and that I will be wearing them inappropriately at fancy events. Ha. Take that, dress shoe industry! I reject your standards of cruel and unusual punishment consisting of unstable spike heels and reams of dangerously shiny straps.
In one of the southern states (probably Texas), a woman ordered a salad at Applebee's. The salad came. In it was a lizard head. 100% true story. You can't make this stuff up. Now, I've never found a lizard head in my salad one of the few times I ate at Applebee's, but now I am full of worry about this. Who knows what sort of animal craniums I have consumed there? Anywho, what I want to know is, what kind of lizard was it? I mean, if it was an anole lizard or a gecko or something, yeah, that would be pretty damn gross, but at least it would be a small lizard head. If it was an iguana or one of those bearded lizard things they have in Texas, that would be pretty damn disturbing. But if we're talking Komodo dragon head here, that's like finding a severed dinosaur head in your salad. I don't think I would be eating there again if I found a severed dinosaur head in my salad.
this bearded lizard's head is actually still attached to its body
Class is nearing it's inevitable end. I'm not as tired anymore, after the adrenaline rush of blogging (I kid, I kid), but I will probably fall right back asleep in english.
Sigh and alas and all that.