Thursday, October 31, 2002
Two posts in one day. It is most fortuitous for you, cher readers.
So, what did I do on Halloween? My last Halloween at home? Since I had already gone to Salem, I hung around at home. More specifically, at Liz's house. With Liz and Jess. And Remy. We made s'mores. They were D-licious. We got a real fire going, and we had skewers, and we set marshmallows on fire. Many, many fires. Much smoke. Much chocolate and even more graham cracker crumbs. Much laughter and talk and watching of bad TV shows. I almost wrote TB shows, but that's not right. No tuberculosis in Liz's TV... I don't think.
Anyways, we had to lock Remy in his room so that he wouldn't eat all the marshmallows, and when we let him out he ran upstairs and drank out of the toilet. Yuck. Cats don't do that, or at least mine don't. They're far too refined, you see.
So Jess gave me a ride home and when we pull up to my house I see my brother standing outside, cleaning my dad's car with a paper towel and brandishing a nine-iron. I was, quite naturally, curious.
He said that he had been sitting inside when he saw some kid on the street outside the window. It didn't really register with him what was going on until he suddenly saw Noah come charging out of his house and go for the kid. Then my brother grabbed his nine-iron and ran outside to join Noah. The kid was shaving creaming/TPing (but not TBing, because that would involve biological weaponry not available to your average Halloween hooligan).
On hearing this, I imagined Noah running outside and bellowing, but Eli says he wasn't bellowing. I personally think that it would have been much more amusing if he was bellowing, and if you think about it that way it's a lot funnier. Although it's pretty funny any way you look at it. I enjoy bellowing. Especially bellowing like a wounded buffalo. That's the best kind.
OK, I digress. The long and short of it is, my brother and Noah chased off this youthful delinquent, and TP was removed from Noah's trees, or wherever it was, and is currently sitting in a large round wad in the middle of his driveway. Eli remained outside to wipe down my dad's car, still with his nine-iron, just in case the kid came back. I give him credit for that aggressiveness. It's in actions like that, running after a young and misguided (but undoubtedly evil) child with a nine-iron, yes, it's in actions like that where you can see my relation to my brother. It is not apparent otherwise.
I also hear that there are some choice swear words written down the road a ways, in spray paint, but I don't much feel like going out to examine the veracity of this claim. I suppose that I shall accept it as truth.
Now Eli is getting up every few moments to look out the window, in the hopes of finding that kid again, so that he can beat his brains out with his trusty weapon of choice.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Good story. Just picture Noah and my brother running after this little scalawag, Eli waving a golf club, both of them bellowing, if you like. A most glorious picture. I almost wish I had been there to see it. Almost. I think I had more fun with the s'mores.
What makes what goes up.........................stay up?
Whatever it is.......................................it ain't physics.
Today Liz said the following:
"I'm dressed up as a twin...... of myself."
"Ms. Henning likes the semen!"
"And then I put on the flame-retarded gloves!"
So, as you can see, she was having a good day.
OK, costume report. No reason for it, except that I don't really feel like stopping blogging to do homework just yet.
Me- Cat. black. (see previous blog)
Maura- Maddie. sweater w/ collared shirt underneath (see 10/17 blog)
Maddie- Maura. shirt zipped all the way down. looked just like her.
Corey- Skeleton. painted a t-shirt. very cool.
Jason- Sandman. or something. anyways, he looked tired.
Russel- Andrew murphy. it was funny.
Sarah- Old man. married to greg marie, who was a very buxom old woman.
Meredith- Jackie popeo. i think jackie dressed up meredith.
Avery- Marissa. yup.
Marissa- Avery. yup.
Rebecca- Champ. i liked her simpson's shirt.
Pretty much everyone else wimped out. Lame-bums.
But do you see what I mean about people dressing up as each other? They ended up just looking slightly odd, and it was only really funny if you knew them. And the other people who were obviously dressed up were mostly dressed as what seemed to be police whores (vinyl and badges), taxi driver whores (checked skirts and high boots), angel whores (white sheer dresses with pink fur), or just plain old regular whores. So, you see, a nice, normal, entirely dressed black cat looked a little out of place.
Sigh. Such is life.
Well, I am beginning to feel the onset of exhaustion. So I had better go do my work and go to sleep.